I wanted it, I had it, it never really left…

I wanted it, I had it, it never really left…

The indiscriminate taste of a heart’s darkest moment drenched in a puddle of despair
Not enough to drown you or relive those past years, only an extended cry for air
No pumps or revitalization mechanisms to save; no compressors or draped white suited PAs

The magnitude of trust becomes minimal like an overheated cube of ice
Evaporating the sincerity of what I met, not once, but twice
No call for duty or siren induced search
For I walked in, booked myself, and greeted the clerk

3 walls, 12 bars, the freest of freedoms;
Fantasizing about what I couldn’t fathom but distraught about its reality
It’s not that the sun didn’t shine brightly or the dew was distasteful
Only it was so real, falsified by the halt in time of what I could feel
Outside of myself, commentating what my mind discussed with my heart
I wanted it, I had it, it never really left…

Eve and her sisters’ sisters became a thing of the past
As the insecurities drove toward new failures, seemingly non-stop
Sympathizing with what was hidden; walking behind my eyelids, life un-cropped
Aimlessly running in the passenger seat with the end opposite of my right
As technicalities became obsolete, unconditional-izing this fight

Its clarity reigned in wonderland,
while this unexplained feeling condensed on the very surface of my backbone
Falling deeper into that unconscious state where smiles reside and happiness is sewn
I wanted it, I had it, it never really left…
Absence favored the process of thinking, fading away the theory of eternal promises
While coloring the suppression of that root
Synchronized voices applauded my pursuit; I couldn’t do this because I left my black suit

By: Dominique C. Cooper
Copyright DCC.